I’m sure there are quite a few of you in the crowd that reads this blog that are familiar with the webcomic xkcd, and particularly number 1053, “The Lucky Ten Thousand.”
Basically, it’s about common knowledge: even when things are allegedly “common knowledge”, there’s a large group of people who – every day – learn about it for the very first time.
I was a member of “The Lucky 10,000” today, but I am not feeling particularly lucky. In fact, I’m feeling sad, mad, bitter and a little overwhelmed right now.
Today is the day I found out Linda Walter passed away. Back in January.
Yeah, I am NOT okay right now.
The worst of this experience is not the cruel irony of me being unaware of this news for five full months. Or the fact that I had a blind spot in my vision so large that an entire person, someone very important to me and my personal history, fell into it.
Or that nobody even mentioned it to me even casually or wondered why I didn’t say anything about it before.
When I don’t talk about a popular or trending topic it’s because (a) I don’t have anything worthwhile to say about it, (b) I’m legally obligated not to talk about it, or (c) I know/knew nothing about it.
It may seem like I am all-knowing sometimes. But I am not, and it does not hurt to drop me a line and let me know.
I haven’t been able to get around the Internet much this year for reasons I’d rather not discuss now, aside from my Paramount Plus subscription. (Because seeing an optimistic vision of the future is something critical to my mental health.) And I do not do Facebook because I already have too much drama in my life and that much social interaction sucks the life out of me.
(A couple of you were kind enough to let me know about the APH situation as it unfolded on Facebook, and I’m grateful for that. You guys, specifically, do rock.)
No, what hurts the most is the fact that I only learned of this now: I simply have no time to grieve. My boss was kind enough to give me a day to process my rawest emotions, but now I have to put them back in a box and take care of all the other things I need to take care of over the next three weeks.
It’s only when I’m in some of those big empty spaces in between the places I’ll be visiting in Wyoming that I think I can unwrap that box and set them free.
“You attend the funeral, you bid the dead farewell. You grieve. Then you continue with your life. And at times the fact of her absence will hit you like a blow to the chest, and you will weep. But this will happen less and less as time goes on. She is dead. You are alive. So live.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Sandman, Vol. 6: Fables & Reflections
5 comments:
Awwww Andrea!! I, for one, am so sorry that you didn't know about Linda!!
Even though we both read the same model horse news blog, I can understand where we *don't spend 24/7 on social media as seems to be the trend!(I tend to avoid it because I can't stand the negativity and the attitude people tend to show towards others nowadays!)
I don't remember much conversation going on on said blog about her--but I contributed that to the youth of the readers (many of them wouldn't have known her--just like they wouldn't know who Marney W. or Elizabeth B. was!!)
Ha! To be fair, I had never heard of "xkcd--the lucky 10,000"(until you mentioned it!) which just means we all travel in different spheres!
If you want, I'll be glad to alert you to things like this so you won't feel left out of the loop!! (as I'm sure your other readers will as well!!)
We realize how busy you are, lady--but *don't * forget to take time out for yourself(and your emotional health!) and if you need to grieve---then GRIEVE!! There's no time limit for mourning the loss of someone who meant so much!!
I’m sorry, that’s tough all around.
When you’re feeling up to it, it could be fun to provide the readers with the origin story of History Diva, and a who’s who of the greats. Newcomers and new readers would find it helpful and informative!
Just so you know--there's going to be a plaque unveiling ceremony for both Marney and Linda @Breyerfest this year as major founders of the Model horse hobby as we know it!
I felt the same way about Facebook and didn’t join until 2019. I now love it for informational purposes…..the various groups are are awesome, although I still rely on Blab for most model horse info. You don’t have to participate in drama unless you want to (I don’t!!). I mostly use it for the groups and rarely post anything on my timeline. They have some great vintage model groups, related to models and hobby founders.
My apologies -- I truly didn't know that you knew Linda, and I guess I thought you'd heard about it already. I spend a lot of time on FB, but basically because it's the only way I have to stay in touch with quite a few friends, mostly from the model horse hobby. As Anonymous said, there'll be a plaque unveiled for both Linda and Marney this year, so maybe you'll be able to attend?
From the FB group Remembering Our Past Model Horse Friends:
"At Breyerfest on Saturday July 15 at 2 p.m., there will be a special unveiling of two memorial plaques, honoring hobby giants, Marney Walerius (Model Horse Congress, Chicago), and Linda Walter (the Model Horse Showers Journal). The event will take place at the Miller Barn near the Alltech Arena." (Quoted entirely without permission of the page's mods.)
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